Monday, January 9, 2012


About a month ago, I was walking up the stairs to my apartment, followed by an older gentleman. As I scurried up the stairs, my foot slipped and I fell, bending the tip of my middle finger backward.

As in any such embarrassing situation, I turn around to look at the guy behind me and make that "Hey, wasn't that embarrassing that I just fell down the stairs but good thing I have enough of a sense of humor about it to laugh so it's really not that embarrassing after all hahaha" face. He, however, is beet red and determinedly not making eye contact with me. This makes me feel like even more of a dumb klutz, so I gather myself and my dignity and run up the stairs to my apartment as fast as I can.

In all the hubbub, I missed out on the fact that my finger was hurting like a mf-er. This became pretty apparent once I got to my place. I put some ice on it and went about my life.

Three weeks later, my finger is still swollen and pretty painful. After consulting google and some accident-prone friends, general consensus is that it's fractured. Being the starving artist that I am, I figure I can either go to the doctor and get charged $300 for them to say, "Yep... it's fractured. Here's a splint". Or, I can go to CVS and buy a splint for $7.

I was pretty pumped about this splint at first. I think injuries are exciting. They get you attention, and I like attention. Plus, insta-conversation starter. Most of the conversations are pretty basic. People ask what happened to my finger, and I basically say verbatim what I just wrote. (So... if you already asked me, and now you're reading this and hearing it all again... sorry). Sometimes, however, you come across gems like this:

Plastered 60 year old rich lady: That is ADORABLE.
Me: Oh. Um, thank you. It's not really a fashion accessory though... it's a splint. My finger's fractured.
P60YORL: You know, in the '80s I used to get my one pinky nail plated in gold - real gold - and that reminds me of it!
Me: Oh. That's... good.

I've had this thing on my finger for a week now, and the novelty has worn off. It makes my finger stiff and makes it hard to do things and I worry that drivers in other cars think I'm flipping them off when I drink from my water bottle... and my finger is still swollen and painful. According to my dad, who's had more than his fair share of injured bones, I'll probably need to leave this thing on anywhere from 3-6 weeks.

At least the baby boomer elite of DC think it's classy.

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